Theres no such thing as Happy Ending

Weird... the more I hurt myself just to divert all the pains that she caused me the more I remember her. I really don't know what to do anymore, it is as if my whole being is being suck up by an unknown force. I can't go on anymore. I don't even ask for this feeling it just so happen that I am quite prone to being hurt by my so-called friends and not to mention my past girlfriend. Am I that stupid? Am I some kind of a trash that they just dumped, crushed, and thrown away after they use me up. I'm tired. As my arm bleeds so is my heart. The only difference between these two is that my cuts in my arm will heal someday unlike the cuts in my heart. No amount of time can heal this. Sometimes I just wished that I would melt or dissolve in the thin air but we both know that it can only happen in those movies. I'm really desperate for someone to love me, whether it maybe love as friends or the real "love" that you get from that special someone. The only problem is that it seems like theres no such person existing these days. Theres no such thing as happy ending.. I'm thinking, no matter how happy the ending was.... still it has ended.